Written by Ritisha Chakrabarty from The Harker School, California, USA Department of Health and Human Services Office Meeting Minutes (recorded by a buxom blonde woman with no qualifications): HHS Staff Meeting on the Future of American Health (Post-Funding Era) Date: October 10, 2025 Location: Department of Health and Human Services, Washington, D.C. Moderator: Matt Buckham, Acting Chief of Staff of the HHS Present: Matt Buckham: Currently: Acting Chief of Staff of the U
Written by Audrey Su from Culver Academies, Indiana, USA In 2026, with midterms approaching and political absurdity at an all-time high, Elon Musk announced the launch of the America Party from Chicago, Earth (for now). His goal: disrupt democracy’s dusty codebase and replace it with something faster, funnier, and fully Mars-compatible. America Party National Convention Land Acknowledgement (As declared at the “2026 Midterm Launch Event” in Chicago, Earth for now) The America
